So some of these things i'm such you ladies can relate to, and to any guys reading this: your prostate exams have nothing on this.
Here is a list of awkward moments during your gynecological appointment:
1) When the nurse asks you to get changed for the exam, and only gives you one small
hospital gown. Great! Now I have to make it from the toilet to the procedure room with what can only be describes as a curtain to my anus- and the curtain is too small to close!
Why, oh, why can they not give you another one for the back like a coat?
2) When You sit down on the chair and are finally relieved to
have covered your bum, until the doctor comes in an says
"Spread your legs."
nothing has ever made you want to own a chastity belt more!
3) When you are really worried that there might be like a tiny bit of toilet roll that has stuck
to your hoo-hoo (we all know it happens) but it's too late to check now.
4) When they start making small talk with you: "so what's the weather like outside"
or worse they start making jokes "knock knock..." i'm not going to ask who's there, I already
know the answer: you're there, down there! Please just focus on that 5) when they come at you with the speculum
and a large cotton bud and all you see
is this ===>>>
Even worse: when the doctor then says I need to go get a smaller one: "you're really tight"
It's so awkward that you don't know what to say
"eh...thank you" AWKWARD!
6) When they leave the room and come back with some other doctors/nurses/ or medical students and you're legs are spread for all to see.
"Eh, hi everyone! Why don't you make an orderly que!"
7) When the doctor asks the nurse to "go get the lube," especially when the doctor is a creepy
old man. And if the doctor is a creepy old man then the moment when he put's on the blue gloves while smiling at you makes you want to run away!
8) When they tell you they are going to do an ultrasound and you didn't realise they meant an internal ultrasound until they whip out a large stick.This is the moment when your legs close over, and the doctor has to ask you to open them again. This particularly horrifying if you've never had an internal ultrasound, the stick just looks huge.
9) when they have ran out of tissues so you know that you need to put your clothes back on
without having wiped away the masses of lube the doctor has smeared on you.
Although you know people can't see anything, you can feel everything- gross!
10) When you are left alone to put your clothing back on but you can't seem to find your underwear
so you just ditch it and run. But you know there is a random pair of pants hidden
somewhere in there; it's time to change doctors!
Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed!
Amy x
P.S: Here's some funny Gynecologist Doctor names
